I think it’s brave that you get up in the morning even if your soul is weary and your bones ache for a rest

I think it’s brave that you keep on living, even if you don’t know how to anymore

I think it’s brave that you push away the waves rolling in every day and you decide to fight

I know there are days when you feel like giving up but

I think it’s brave that you never doPoem: “I Think It’s Brave” by Lana Rafaela

Dear Friends,

As we consider the words of the Christmas carol, O Holy Night, we understand better than ever, a world of sin and error, pining for release.  May all oppression cease and may our souls rise to the thrill of hope that Christ’s birth offers us. 

Our January e-news includes:

Book Review:  Setting Aside Silence (One Word at a Time)

Health Impacts of Domestic Violence

Miracles are Made of This

January is National Stalking Awareness Month

Our next CCSF meeting is January 20th, 2024.

Stop the Abuse, Heal the Family, Change the Future

Email: ccsf.hope@gmail.com

Website: https://www.ccsfhope.org

Twitter: @CCSFDV

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Book Review:  Setting Aside Silence (One Word at a Time)

Setting Aside Silence (One Word at a Time) is a faith-based approach to domestic violence and includes an alphabetized list of words and definitions, resources, headlines taken from current events, scriptures, encouragement, places for reflective thoughts, and more. For victims/survivors, family members, and friends, this book will give (the reader) an insider’s perspective on this personal topic as author Shawn Richard-Davis shares from her heart. Setting Aside Silence is ideal for individual study, and survivor groups, and it can be used as chronological reading, a topical index, a journal, or a devotional. Shawn’s wish is that the reader will come away with a deeper understanding of domestic violence and, hopefully, healing of one’s soul. Book by Shawn Richard-Davis, with a foreword by Nancy Murphy, just released November 2023, available on Amazon at $17.95.

Health Impacts of Domestic Violence

By KW

As many people in America decide to kick start some healthy new habits for the new year, I wanted to remind people who are still in abuse situations (or recently exited from one) of the health impact you could be experiencing. Also please take note of these if you are friends or family members on the support team for someone in this condition.

• Most individuals have heard of sleep deprivation as a subtle tactic of abuse. Women and men in abuse relationships are “sleeping with one eye open” or “walking on eggshells” so often that their bodies genuinely can’t relax to get in to deep, restful sleep.
• Consequences of the lack of sleep are listed by the National Institute of Health in a 3/24/22 article list: hypertension, diabetes, obesity, depression, heart attack and stroke.
• Risks of increased tiredness are driving accidents or workplace errors.
• Trouble concentrating, focusing, and reacting appropriately appear as it becomes hard to judge other people’s reactions and read facial cues correctly.
• Eventually, some people become numb to what is going on around them.

Here at CCSF we understand that frequently the abuser is so controlling that it may not be allowable for you/them to leave but do try to come up with some type of respite plan. Perhaps your church needs to make a women’s retreat on short notice to provide timely relief for such instances. Time away and sleep can give a person the strength to make the difficult decisions they need to make for themselves.

Advice from medical professionals includes: Seek medical therapy, counseling, and talk with your support team to see if there are safe places you and your family can go for respite care just as if you were doing long term chronic care for someone else. Be your own best friend or advocate. If you are on the support team, consider having code words or code emojis that mean they need a break and for you to ask them over or go check in on them.

May we all see increased health, better sleep, and true wellness in 2024.

*Beyond such serious medical issues, an article in The Journal of Allergy and Clinical Immunology in June 2023 explained the medical transformations that occurred to those exposed to DV include elevated responses to common allergens and developing eczema, asthma, and allergic rhino conjunctivitis. As well, chronic stress can also trigger or worsen other autoimmune responses, including arthritis, fibromyalgia, irritable bowel syndrome and dermatitis.

Miracles are Made of This

By CL

The very best way to come alongside a person who has lost much, is sick physically and emotionally and cannot see their way out of a desperate dilemma is to think of a person who has been hit by a truck – lying on the side of the road. Having called 911 for an ambulance, a caring person would rush up and comfort the person. This is the scenario that would be most helpful in my opinion: touch the person gently, say comforting words, give the hope of help coming soon and what else? What I personally would like to hear most would be “I am here; you will be OK, but I will stay here with you until help arrives.” As my uncle used to say: “practical, effective.” But also, these words answer some giant question, and fill the emotional chasm of terror effectively.

What is powerful about these words and actions? Here it is: at a time when every faculty is suspended and all hope is lost, what is needed is clear thinking, practical help and words that bring warmth and relief. It sets the tone for a vision of survival. What is not needed is questions about what happened and why. Those can come later.

So, this is the way we comfort a woman who is abused – not with an assault, but with a promise. And that is the very thing that is hardest for the caring person to do. We suspend our “fix it” impulse. It’s like a warm blanket in the emergency room. The entire abused body system breathes fully and let’s go. It says “I am in good hands; someone cares about me; I will be alright”. What better way to give an injection of hope to the hopeless and help to the helpless?

May all our interactions have this quality of hope: our job is to hold hope when there is no hope. Our faithful prayers in a drastic situation have this quality: believing God can do the impossible and letting that belief spill into terrible situations infusing it with the stuff of which miracles are made.

January is National Stalking Awareness Month

January 2024 is the twentieth annual National Stalking Awareness Month (NSAM) and the first ever Day of Action for Stalking Awareness!

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©2024 Christian Coalition for Safe Families